I try to make every weekend a self-care weekend. Before my diagnosis, I had always promised myself that I would do something for myself. Not because I tend to neglect my needs, but because I kept focusing on my wants. It's not the same, and many people don't understand that. I may want to just lay in bed and watch movies, but that doesn't mean that that activity counts as self-care. If watching movies truly helps me to relieve stress and I did it for that reason, that would be fine. But that wasn't the case. I just wanted it...why not? Meantime, my soul, my mind, my body...they all wanted something more. I didn't pay attention.
Something I just want may not be what I need, and vice-versa. What does count as self-care then? The definition is: Self-care is a conscious act people take to promote their physical, mental, spiritual, and emotional health. Watching movies just because I want to is not a conscious act that I take to promote anything. As a matter of fact, I just do it because I'm bored, and don't plan to put any effort into anything else.
Did you know that sometimes in order to do some self-care or utilize coping skills we need to push ourselves? I'm not talking about going for a run when we hardly have energy due to pain or fatigue. I'm talking about tiny little things that we would be able to do...we just don't wanna because we don't feel like it. Listen to what your body, subconscious mind, and soul are whispering to you because their words can clash with your conscious thoughts.
Tonight I thought about taking a bath with cedarwood bath salts. Ehhh...it's cold, and I'm sitting on my bed, watching an episode of an old Hungarian soap opera. I don't wanna. Then my mind told me: "I need that relaxing feeling cedarwood gives me." My hands told me: "My joints are swollen and achy. That bath would help." I got up and took a bath. I was so happy I did. This is just one example of how self-care and "pushing" works. Then I made myself chamomile tea and listened to my favorite mantra songs by Deva Premal. Those were all conscious decisions. I needed them even though at first, I didn't care. Tomorrow, I will do some chores, take a walk while breathing deeply, and do one of my favorite meditations. Guess what? It's a meditation in which you're running with wolves. It's very powerful. Ironic? That's okay. And if I don't have the energy to do my chores or walk (thankfully, fatigue is not a symptom yet...), my body and soul will tell me what to do instead. I can come up with so many different self-care techniques:
spa day at home
reading
writing (when my hands allow me)
gentle exercise like chair yoga
aromatherapy session
staring into candle lights!!
meditation
making fast and healthy finger food
digging up old photos that bring beautiful memories
chatting with someone (online or in-person, like the husband hehe)
and more...
TGIF!!!
Way cool